It never stops and I want it to!

So, not a quippy title but pretty much sums up where I'm at right now.

W had his scope yesterday to check on his reflux and any damage, biopsies to double check for allergic disease ect.

This was his first anaesthetic and he was very scared beforehand. Thankfully having been through all of this about a year ago with T I was able to tell him pretty much exactly what was going to happen when. Turns out he's like his mother and vomits on anaesthetics - sigh.

The surgeon has said that his oesophagus was quite red in the middle portion - had more to see than with either of the other two! He took biopsies from top, middle and bottom - pink at top and bottom.

Anyway we get the results and schedule yet another nissen fundoplication on the 22nd of Sept. At this point the probable surgery date is 6 Oct.

I was even recognised by a Recovery Room nurse yesterday - this is 4th time I've taken a kid to theatre in less than 2 years. N kicked this all off with his nissen on 2 Oct 2007 and if W gets the 6 Oct date then all 3 will have had this major operation in the space of just over 2 years.

I'm so tired. Tired of kids in pain, tired of kids with health concerns, tired giving meds, monitoring weight, trying to get them to eat, tired of hospitals and doctors - just plain tired.

I just want it to end, I do NOT want to be looking down the barrel of just starting the treadmill all over again.

But we need to, William needs it to happen. 30mg of omeprazole wasn't stopping the reflux, it's causing the cardiac stuff - the reflux has to be stopped and this is the way to do it.

But I want to curl up somewhere or throw a full scale 2 year old tantrum!
IT'S NOT FAIR!

N still isn't eating properly and I've just made an appointment for him for the paed. I don't know what the next step is there - gee maybe we could throw the surgical option at him and put in a tube - yeah whatever. Doubt it but my kids seem to be surgery magnets at the moment so what's another one...I just don't want to ever take a kid to theatre EVER again!
I hate it, hate handing them over, hate collecting them afterwards, hate waiting - just hate it!

Ah well, vent over!
Until next time,
Eleanor.